Can someone pls help me to correct the grammar in this quote? (Appreciated)?

Question:I corrected and revised the quote already, but I don't know if it is good or not, so pls help me on the grammar, thank you! ^_^

Money cannot buy you time; but time can make you a lot of money, depending on your abilities. If you are committed to sacrifice your time to save money, then why not invest your money effectively to optimize your time efficiently?

Answers:
If it is a direct quote, then it should be written in its original form. If this is YOUR quote, I would correct it as follows:

Money cannot buy you time; but depending on your abilities, time can make you a lot of money. If you are committed to sacrifice your time to save money, then why not effectively invest your money to optimize your time efficiently?
The only problem I see is that the semi-colon in the first line should be a comma, because of the word "but."
Also eliminate the first "you" and the second "your"..
the second sentence needs to be
If you are committed to sacrificing your time to save money...
committed to sacrificing, not committed to sacrifice.

and i don't like the end. is the optimization itself efficient? i think that's redundant, you are optimizing your time, or you are using your time efficiently. yes, that one.

If you are are committed to sacrificing your time to save money, why not invest your money effectively to use your time efficiently.
something like that.

all the answers above me are really really bad!

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