How can I come across without being snotty?

Question:My son has an IEP. Last year was great for him excellant teacher and his special needs aid understood his interest to redirect properly. Ever since I have start asking question from the end of last year I feel like I am getting the run around. I did the IEP and put in what I had wanted NOW since I have seen what is going on I want to redo it and have EVERYONE who is involved with clayton there so I knw it is done properly. 1st off his "new" speech teacher is to meet with him 8-830 in am I asked her at oreintation Do I go striaght to your class in the morning? she said "oh just leave him in the gym and someone should bring him to me" Sorry he is 5 and will leave when he wants without warning and he has an issue with receptive language. I told her no I am leaving him with his aide. I stayed the 2 hours the first day and never seen her. They have no clue how or what to do.

Answers:
When we were going through "difficulties" with my austistic daughter's various teachers over the years, I found the following "pattern" to be very helpful in assisting me to find the right words to advocate on my daughter's behalf without being the Mom From Hell ('cause we all know that rubs off on the way the child is treated...): it's "When you.I feel.I want you to." Example:

You: "When you ask me to leave my son unattended while waiting for his speech class to start, I feel uneasy because he tends to wander off when he's on his own and I'm afraid he will get hurt while he is unsupervised. I also feel like his specific problems and needs are not being taken as seriously as I would like them to be. I want you to assign an aide to be with him at all times, so that he is not left alone, and I can feel reassured that someone is watching out for his well-being at all times while he is at school."

If the principal or teacher or whoever tries to tell you they don't have the resources to do this, just repeat, repeat, repeat - "When you ask me to leave him alone, I feel like." and so on. If they tell you they never leave him alone, produce a diary so that you can back up your observations with facts, i.e., "8/28, arrived at gym at 7:59. Speech teacher arrived at 8:14. 8/29, arrived at gym at 7:55, teacher's aide arrived at 8:04. 8/30, arrived at gym at 8:02. Teacher's aide arrived at 10:13," or whatever.

And DON'T be afraid to take this up to the next level at the district headquarters, or whatever. The school is REQUIRED by law to provide an equitable education for your child - if they can't do it, they are obligated to find someone who can.

Hope this helps - good luck!
I am having trouble understanding your question. from what I gather your sons speech teacher is not seeing him at the appropriate time. Are there other problems witht the rest of the team? As far as time of day, an IEP cannot dictate that, however he/she needs to provide the services each week written in the IEP. I would have the speech teacher write a little not each week telling you what they worked on to be sure they are meeting.
As far as a new meeting, if you are happy with the services written in the iep than a new meeting is not necessary. You could request a parent conference witht he team and discuss your concerns. Explain how you don't feel the goals are being addressed properly and approach it as what can WE do as a team. This way you are not placing blame, but instead being an active partcipant. I know as a parent you want what is best for your child, but if you go in accusing then the school will write you off as the crazy parent. I know that is not right, but they are just people too. They all want whats best for your child. Work together not aginst each other. Now, if things do not improve after the meeting then I would get an advocate and see what you can do.
What you feel is really common.

Find a local special needs parenting group. It takes dilligence and persistence to get what you want from public schools...They can help you get an advocate to help you.
Though the run around that u are given is common it is NOT appropriate. You need to be pushy & tell these people what needs to be done & when it needs to happen. If they say they can not do things in the manner you feel best accomodates your son remind them of the disability laws under IDEA. All students are entitled to FAPE (Free apropriate public education) If they can not adequately provide this then they are mandated by law to pay for a private school &/or other services that he may need. Call for a team meeting & reject as many IEPs as needed until your son gets the education he deserves. Good luck & be persistant.
It is always tough the first month of school. If you haven't contacted an advocate, it is suggested that you locate one in your area. They can help you find the balance you are looking for.

If you want success for your child in school, call another IEP meeting and discuss the supports that your son had last year to the supports that he appears to have this year. For example, the district does not have to supply you with the teachers lessons plans however you could say something like: Clayton really response positively to having visual supports to help him anticipate what will be happening throughout the day. Can we set up a visual schedule for him so he can anticipate what activities will be happening and when he needs to attend therapy? This would help you get a copy of daily happenings. Dependong on the program that your child is in, the teacher will send this home to the parents within 4-6 weeks of school starting.

An IEP does not state when a child should get speech. The IEP can only say the number of hours per week. However, the SLP from the previous year could have written in the present level that Clayton appeared to be more proactive and engaging in the AM before he became interested in other activities in the classroom. This would indicate to the speech therapist that he is a good child to start the day off with.

Therapist typically do not work for the first two weeks of the school year directly with the students. I would check with the case manager on the district procedures. Typically the therapist have the first week to observe, test and develop their schedules. If you didn't indicate that you were there to observe a session with your child, she would have had no clue you were there to see her. I am sure if you had indicated that you were there to observe a speech session, she would have done one of two things: one told you that she wasn't hold sessions this week they would start on such and such date or the second option would have indicated that your son wasn't on the schedule for therapy for that day.

You can request a daily communication log book be sent home. Typically districts will agree to have the teacher write daily. Depending on your child he might be able to handle filling out a picture support log sheet which would indicate what he did during the day. The adults would give additional information.
Unfortunately,getting the services your child needs is often a struggle and you have to stay on top of things.It would be nice to think you could drop them off at school and the professionals would be doing what is right for the child.I don't know if it is because they have too many kids to deal with or what but you can't worry about "coming across snotty" or what anyone thinks of you for doing what you think is right for your child.

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